5 Scientific Discoveries That Crap All Over Our Current Understanding Of Physics

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5) Black Holes Are Like Paul Daniels

Weird Physics - Paul Daniels - Black Hole

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Everyone knows that if you destroy something it doesn’t disappear, it just breaks into separate pieces. For instance, yesterday I totally destroyed a triple cheeseburger, but I know it didn’t actually disappear. It sat in my gut for a few hours getting broken down into its constituent parts. Much of it was released as gas, some came out as a log and other bits are currently clogging up my lower intestine and arteries.

The same thing goes for space. If you blow up a planet then the planet might be gone, but there will be a planet’s worth of rock floating through the cosmos. This is all basic stuff, but wait, here comes a black hole to lay the smack down on good sense.

Black holes eat whatever comes close to them, that’s what they like to do. If they eat an asteroid, their mass increases by an asteroid’s worth. Fine, no problem, chew away Mr Hole. But, if a black hole disappears, everything disappears with it. Poof. As the black hole evaporates it gives off random heat energy, nothing to do with its mass.

It makes no sense, physicists hate black holes. And now, so do I.

If you’ve got a headache after all that drama click here to laugh at weird-looking people on Russian social networks. If you are some sort of masochist and want more physics rammed into your eyes and brains click here for the Sick Chirpse guide to the Higgs Boson.

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