9. Kony

Nobody has really known exactly where the horrendously bloodthirsty Ugandan warlord Joseph Kony has been ever since that time he became a social media sensation back in 2012, but the UN reckon he’s hiding somewhere in a South Sudanese jungle. Perhaps giving him a role working on our televisions may be the kick he needs to get him back on the right track and into an industry where he wouldn’t have to traffic tens of thousands of children and force them to become child soldiers and sex slaves. After all, ISIS kinda stole his schtick the BBC aren’t completely averse to turning a blind eye to their employees using children for sexual purposes, CC: Jimmy Savile.

The controversial news of Kony’s new job would bound to gain worldwide media attention, therefore giving Top Gear the boost it probably desperately needs now that Clarkson is gone.