We’re always excited about new condiments here at Sick CHirpse, but the idea of a grey flavoured mayonnaise has us all slightly puzzled. What would it even taste like? And why do you want to combine those two flavours/textures?

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Hellman’s have decided to launch the new sauce with the idea of combining the nation’s preference for chippy teas. The north are apparently well into gravy and southerners prefer to dip their chips into mayonnaise (soft), so why not combine the two?

Well I would argue that a reason not to do that would because it doesn’t sound appetising at all, but apparently everyone at Hellman’s knows better than me and thought it was an awesome idea. They’re bringing out a Coronation Chicken and Chili mayonnaise too, both of which sound way more appetising.

Here’s what Rachel Chambers, marketing manager at Hellmann’s had to say about the new offering:

We know just how much Brits love a takeaway and with the fakeaway style of cooking booming during lockdown, we wanted to provide the nation with restaurant-inspired flavours they could enjoy at home.

We’re incredibly excited to announce our market-first gravy mayo and hope all three, delicious new flavours will bring a bold new twist to dishes served at Jubilee parties and BBQs nationwide this summer.

Can you really see all of the Jubilee parties you’re attending this summer pulling out the gravy mayonnaise to go with your chips or on your burger or whatever? No, me neither but if you want to pick a bottle up it’ll set you back £2.25 and it’s available from April.

For more of the same, check out the grossest use of mayonnaise in history. Way worse than you could ever imagine.