8 People You Will Meet In Every Gym

A handy guide to spotting all creatures great and small lurking in your gym. How many do you recognise?

The Emaciated

emaciated boys going to the gym

The Emaciated are young pups yet unschooled in gym etiquette and machine know-how, so thin they make Bobby Sands circa 1981 look fat. These young rapscallion’s have only recently learnt the importance of the gym in being a man and getting bitches. They’ve seen people off the telly doing weights like on Prison Break and shit and vastly overestimate the strength of their matchstick limbs. However, what they lack in body mass they make up with girl chasing grit and determination. The Emaciated are usually coached by one of their peers, who is seen as God of The Emaciated because his dad took him to the gym once.

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