Eurovision Fans Fear UK Is ‘Serious Contender For Last Place’ After Performance Reveal

ByMF Jones

It’s not looking great for the UK at this week’s Eurovision after a clip of our representative’s performance was released online.

Look Mum No Computer – real name Sam Battle – will be representing the nation with his track Eins, Zwei, Drei (yep, that’s German), which you can check out below…

So it looks like we’re trying something different with this experimental techno-pop/aesthetic, but most people seem to think we’re headed for “nul points” and another last place finish.

The UK has come in last place at Eurovision five times – in 2003, 2008, 2010, 2019 and 2021.

We also finished dismally at 18th in 2024 and 19th in 2025 – receiving zero points from the public vote on both occasions.

Here’s the general reaction online to our 2026 offering…

‘It’s rubbish, but if you mute it and play something good over the- nah it’s still rubbish.’

‘I wonder how bad the other entries had to be for this to be the best option. What system of weights and measures are employed to select our song. I mean this is a new depth… Considering our musical heritage as a country this is embarrasing.’

‘Just remember there was someone that put him forward for this to represent our country with a German speaking song.’

‘Well we won’t be able to accuse Europe of not liking us and that being the reason we don’t do well this year. It’s because this is sh-t.’

‘What is this pandering sh-t? Trying to sound like a traditional ‘quirky’ eurovision song.’

‘Look Mum No Points!’

‘Is this real? Is this actually our entry this year?’

Pure doom and gloom. Doesn’t get more British than that, does it?

Although, don’t forget – we did finish in second place in 2022 with Sam Ryder’s Space Man, so our Eurovision record isn’t completely terrible, even if it has been a downward trend since then.

Best of luck, Sam – looks like expectations are low so it’s only uphill from here!

For the time Hungary withdrew from the Eurovision song contest because it was ‘too gay’, click HERE.

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