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Kanye West Set To Name His Kid North

kanye west baby

Picking a baby’s name is probably one of the hardest decisions you ever have to make in your life, so why not just make his name the lamest joke in the history of the world? Enter Kanye West.

kanye west baby

I don’t know what to think about Kanye West. On one hand he makes some pretty sick beats that it’s awesome to get down to in the club, but on the other hand he just acts like a dick all the time and does whatever he wants and thinks he’s the dopest mo’fucker on the whole planet. To be fair he probably is one of them, but the trick to actually being the dopest mo’fucker on the planet is probably to not act like you’re the dog’s shit all the time. Maybe take the subway like Jay Z did once or something.

Anyway, his latest dumb adventure (props to Tom Gatenby for pointing it out to us too, even though we had already clocked it) could be one of the dumbest, most attention seeking stunts anyone has ever attempted ever if it’s true, but it also seems like something that someone could have just made up to troll the entire world, or possibly something that Kanye West made up to troll the whole world. It’s unclear at this point just where this rumour emanated from as all we have on every website talking about it is that a ‘source’ has highlighted these facts.

A ‘source’ could literally mean some guy down the boozer last night or a dog turd on the side of the street so that doesn’t really mean anything, but the fact a lot of places are picking up on it means it MIGHT have some legitimacy. I’m not convinced though because some of the stuff this source is saying is really stupid, even by Kanye West’s standards.

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As most of you probably know Kim Kardashian is currently pregnant with Kanye West’s child and it should be arriving around July. The ‘source’ said that Kanye and Kim had already decided on the name of the baby and that it was going to be North, even though the kid is rumoured to be a girl and North is clearly a more masculine name.

But you know, regardless of sex it will be completely cool to call a kid North West right? There’s no way that kid’s going to be bullied right? Well, under normal circumstances you would be incorrect but when it’s Kanye West’s son he’s probably gonna be the flyest son of a bitch in the building so it don’t even matter what his name is, you hear me? I guess the kid’s already got it made so you might as well just give him a stupid name, sure.

Kanye likes it the best out of potential names that were discussed because ‘it fits well with his surname.’ No shit Sherlock. It’s kind of crazy that South got completely dismissed as an option though huh? I mean it didn’t even get a mention in any of the news reports. Sounds like Kanye West discriminates against directions or something but I have got to admit that North does sound A LOT cooler than South, especially if it’s your name.

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Apparently the name was decided upon during Paris Fashion Week, because clearly that’s the time when people expecting children meet up to discuss potential names. The source elaborated on Kanye’s reasoning for this: ‘Kanye’s ego is something else, so he’s quite serious about the title. He also has a sense of humour though and knows how his self-indulgence is seen by the general public. It’s half tongue-in-cheek, half what Kanye probably feels is true.’ It’s cool that Kanye – or the source – used the word title to describe his son’s name because that just shows what a complete badass he is, and how much of a complete badass his son will be, even if the rest of the statement didn’t really make any sense.

He might meet some opposition from Kim Kardashian though, as calling the baby North would break with Kardashian family tradition – where all first names have historically begun with the letter K. I don’t know which is stupider – making sure that everyone in your family’s first name begins with the same letter, or naming your child after a compass direction. Any thoughts?

The source also dropped the bombshell that Kanye wanted to call his next album ‘I Am God’ which kind of makes me think that this story has to be complete bullshit because even Kanye West wouldn’t do something as completely outrageous as that, would he? I guess we’ll have to wait and see.

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