The world’s most well-endowed man, Matt Barr, has a penis that measures over 14.5 inches long when erect – nearly triple the global average of 5.1 inches.
You wouldn’t think that would make Matt a sympathetic figure (quite the opposite), but apparently living with such an enormous c*ck is a total nightmare. Especially when it results in you slipping and breaking your arm in the shower because your gigantic Johnson got in the way.
British AI specialist Matt told Jam Press: “It was a very embarrassing accident.”
“One of the issues with being so large, especially in hot water showers, is that it’s not exactly easy to see my feet. As I was rushing to get ready for work, I didn’t see the excess shower gel in the tub because my penis was the only thing in my eye line.”
“I slipped on it, causing me to fall out of the tub completely headfirst and crack my shoulder on the hard floor.”
Schlong story short (sorry), the London native sustained two fractures, which left him in extreme pain and needing a sling.
Matt has now vowed to “shower less quickly”, adding:
“I’ve had close calls or minor falls before, but never anything this severe. Usually, it’s just been when I’ve had a partner in the shower with me.”
“I’ve always been anxious about going into public showers because of the reactions I get, but now I’m a bit scared of private ones, too.”
He also bought a bathmat so he’s less likely to lose his footing when his willy is obstructing his view.
“This is one of the many minor things no one thinks about when it comes to having an abnormal body. While I’m naturally clumsy, it doesn’t help that I have a different anatomy to most — especially such a large one.”
Indeed, the whole thing was so embarrassing for Matt has he shamefully went to the UK press to talk about how problematically big his penis is for (at least) the second time. You may remember he was on This Morning a year back:
The man with Britain’s biggest penis sheds light on how his anatomy impacts his relationships.#ThisMorning pic.twitter.com/usTQ5lzPDw
— This Morning (@thismorning) April 23, 2024
In fairness to Matt, anyone who’s broken a limb can attest to how annoying it is to constantly be answering questions from friends, family and strangers about how it happened, so at least Matt is taking care of that by going straight to the press about it. Now when anyone sees Matt walking around on the street with his arm in a sling, they’ll think: “oh, that’s Matt Bar, the guy with the world’s biggest penis, who fell over in the shower because his penis is so big that he literally couldn’t see the ground.” No need for Matt to explain, because they’ll already know.
In fairness to Matt again, having a giant penis isn’t quite the same as having a big one. Everyone is envious of dudes of big penises, but a giant penis? That seems like more trouble than it’s worth, as evidenced by Matt here. Worse still, he’s missed the boat on doing OnlyFans because he feels he’s too old to get involved. Imagine what a nice little earner that would’ve been for him.
On not joining OnlyFans or doing p0rn, Matt says: “I’m sure if I was 20 years younger, I would have [because] I’d be more focused on making sure my parents were all good, I’d be in the gym constantly, all these things.”
Alas. Anyway, I’m sure this isn’t the last we’ve heard of Matt Barr and his penis. Maybe Bonnie Blue will get a whiff of this story and drop him a DM suggesting a collaboration? Something to think about while his arm heals up. Get well soon, Matt!
For the bride who waited until marriage to have sex with her husband, only to discover he had a micropenis, click HERE.
