If you’re a regular reader of Sick Chirpse then you probably know that we’re big fans of Danny Dyer and are always chomping at the bit to bring you the latest news involving East London’s finest. If you don’t believe us check out some of these articles we’ve posted involving the great one being an idiot in various different scenarios:
Danny Dyer Calls 9/11 Terrorists Slags
Danny Dyer Stars In Coca Cola Advert
Danny Dyer Gets Interviewed On Acid
But yeah, this video could be the best of the lot. I’ve heard stories of Danny Dyer doing guest DJ sets in London before but even though friends have jokingly suggested going to them I’ve never really paid any mind to it. I mean I guess it would be kinda funny to go to a Danny Dyer DJ set but would I really want to pay money for that? Or travel to wherever the hell it was? Or even be able to find people who thought it would actually be funny to go to it and not people who just laughed at the idea and thought it would be funny to go but then would just bail when it actually came time to actually go? Probably not – logistics man, always putting a dampener on everything.
But then you check out this video and realise that it definitely is for the best that I didn’t go. Like this is really, really funny on the internet but if you actually travelled up there and paid to get in or whatever the joke would get old pretty fast. This is some footage from a DJ set that Danny Dyer played at some shit club called Rockafellas in Corby some time last year. Pretty rock and roll right there Danny. It seems incredible that this video has been knocking around on the internet since last November and yet only has around 10,000 views on YouTube because you would have thought that something as cringe-inducing as this would have gone viral a million times over already. I mean if Paris Hilton’s shitty DJ set can get so much publicity, how can more people not care about Danny Dyer’s?
The videos are pretty great. Amazingly there are three and some ‘bonus footage’ but the main one you want to watch is the second video. It’s shot entirely from in the DJ booth where you see Danny Dyer – wearing some fetching silver headphones – MC’ing (or trying to) on a mic whilst he plays shitty house tunes and touches people in the audience who are desperately trying to grab him. His skill on the mic is what the video is all about though as he comes out with lines like ‘stomp your fvcking feet to this next tune, love this tune’ and ‘shout out to the Coventry boys in the gaffe, where are ya?’ as the camera pans around the empty night club to see a bunch of chavs gurning their faces off holding massive bottles of vodka or whatever and downing them like the true lads that they are.
For some reason later on in the video he also has a live drummer, who I think has one snare drum or something and bangs it a couple of times?! I didn’t really understand that part. There’s also another hype guy who gets the crowd going by saying ‘When I say Danny you say Dyer. Danny’ to which the old gross women in the crowd shout ‘Dyer’. That really happens.
Another cool thing that happens is that in the first video it reveals that Danny Dyer isn’t ACTUALLY DJ’ing, he’s just there hanging out or whatever. Some really old guy who looks like he’s trying to be hip by wearing a ‘cool suit’ called Andy Loveday who looks like he should be DJ’ing at a wedding reception or corporate event is actually DJ’ing. I’m not sure if that makes the set better or worse than if it had come from Danny Dyer himself.
The third video showcases Danny doing a speech where he states that ‘it’s an honour to be here at Rockafellas’ which has to be one of the most ironic sentences he has ever uttered. The rest of this video is just a montage of the club night, which is the kind of montage which makes you never want to go to a club again considering how many gross idiots are in it jumping around and grinding each other.
The ‘bonus footage’ is just more of this crap really, with a good 90 seconds dedicated to some idiot girl (who is definitely old enough to know better) wiggling her butt in front of Danny Dyer’s little DJ booth. I’m not even really sure why it’s described as bonus footage because everything that happens in it happens in all the other videos too i.e. a bunch of chavs dance around while Danny Dyer pretends to DJ and occasionally gets on the mic and spouts some crap. There is a pretty awesome little section at the end where he’s hanging out with the boss of Rackafellas – Roberto – and talks about how he’s had a ‘proper night’ and how Rockafellas and Corby are both ‘proper gaffes.’ It’s worth watching the bonus footage just for that bit to be honest.
All of this really happens and is as cringeworthy as I’ve made it sound, probably even more so. You’ve just gotta see it to believe it, and probably make a mental note to never go to Rockafellas in Corby. Or even anywhere near Corby really. Check out the videos below: