"I'm up for anything."
"This could be you..."
"If you like girls who look like they haven't slept in 4 days hmu."
Genius marketing or advertising cock-up?
"Looking for someone to do dad things with".
"Just looking for a soul to devour."
"Yes, I make movies."
He shoots, he scores.
"I'm willing to give up my kid for a man who knows how to treat a lady."
"Come meet me at your nearest Burger King."
"I enjoy wine and gutter humour."
"I will die before I give up apple sauce."
"Some girls play hard to get. I play hard to want".
"Send me doughnuts and see what happens."
"I'm hoping this picture will make up for the lack of witty bio..."
Some things are better left unsaid.
Rock ‘n’ roll.
"Please be patient, I get a lot of messages."
"I only use Tinder as a confidence boost."
This is why we need feminism.
Rumours, predictions and some guess work.
"Buy my cookies."
“I never wanted this to happen.”
Potential new planet to destroy.
“Give me two truths and a lie…”
His head is now so big, it has its own post code.
Titty trick shots really should be an Olympic sport.
This thing will tear you apart from the inside.