Why spend money on taking professional Tinder head shots, when all you really need to capture that one perfect profile picture is a little direction from those who have studied the art of the Tinder profile photo. Here are 5 pictures everyone needs to maximise their Tinder success:

5. Shoot From Above

Girls have been using this trick since the MySpace days and us guys have just been too stupid to realise it. See the girl in the pic above? In real life she’s completely gross. She knows however that all she has to do is raise the camera over her head a tiny bit, aim downwards and suddenly all the things that make her fat and ugly disappear and she transforms into a 10/10 man-slayer. Try it – it works.

4. Hanging With The Dog

Not saying you should buy a dog purely for the sake of potentially hooking up with some random stranger on Tinder, but not saying you shouldn’t either. Looking after a dog shows that a) you care about animals and b) you know how to look after small, living creatures. Swoon city. Note: That is my dog in the photo above and he is available to rent for Tinder photos in the greater London area. Coming for your business, Max Schwartz.

3. Doing Something Manly

This means manning the barbecue, driving a speedboat, carrying another human to safety while fires rage and building collapse in the background. Anything that shows her you’re a man of action. Just avoid photos where you’re in the gym (too try hard) and photos with sedated tigers in south east Asia (done to death).

2. Wearing A Suit

Doesn’t matter whether you were at your best friend’s wedding or in the dock for raping a goat, you get that photo of yourself in a suit onto your Tinder profile ASAP. Way more presentable than your tracksuit/jeans and trainers attire.

1. Have Boobs And/Or Just A Vagina (Girls Only)

All our female readers should know that men on Tinder aren’t really as difficult to please. In fact, any woman who searches for tips on improving their Tinder matches should not even be allowed to use Tinder at all and deserve to be alone for all eternity (only joking – you’ll find someone).

Want to go really in-depth on the psychology behind Twitter? Check this out.