It’s been a while since we’ve featured some moron who spends a shit ton of money on plastic surgery so they can ‘look’ like one of their idols – who could forget this guy who spent his life savings so he could look like his hero Justin Bieber, or this dude who spent a similar amount so he could look like Jordan? – but we’ve found another one for you today and he could quite possibly be the most tragic yet.
His name is Jordan James Parke and he hails from my hometown of Birmingham and is probably another reason why it’s so bait there. It’s his dream to look like his idol Kim Kardashian and so in order to fulfil this dream, he’s spent over £100,000 on surgery and even more on designer clothes. Not sure if he wears girls’ clothes or what, it isn’t really clear from the photographs or videos, but whatever it is you can be sure it’s designer.
His surgery includes over 50 lip filler operations at £350 a pop, eyebrow tattoos (ridiculous), botox injections, laser hair removal and chin, forehead and cheek filler. Jordan has revealed now though that because of the surgery he can no longer move his face and his lips are constantly leaking filler. He needs to smother them with Vaseline every ten minutes otherwise they become too dry for everyday life. Hey, but at least he’s the spitting image of Kim K right?
It sounds like he’s really spent his money well there, doesn’t it? Here’s what he had to say about it all:
I’m addicted to lip-fillers. The bigger, the better. I’ve never felt better about myself. I laugh when people try to insult me by telling me I look plastic or fake. Do they think I’m going for the natural look? If I was, I’d ask for my money back.
I can’t really move my face. I want just a little bit of definition and they just got bigger and bigger but any attention is good attention. I’m worried if they keep leaking I’m going to end up with small lips again.
Whenever I see a new procedure, I have to try it. I’m in the clinic so often I get a discount. I do borrow money off my family. But I have worked hard, in sales and at a health club.
I work so hard as a make-up artist and I grew up with my mum who would spend the last pound in her purse if she wants something. Now, if I want it, I have it. My mum also likes to buy me things, which I’m very grateful for. I am a little bit spoilt, I have to admit.
I don’t really understand that last part, do you? It sounds to me like his mom has just paid for it all – I mean there’s no way a 23 year old can have spent £100K on plastic surgery and done anything else with their life really, is there? Even if they worked hard in sales and at a health club. Or currently work hard as a make up artist – it just doesn’t add up.
Jordan was appearing on the US show Botched where people talk about their plastic surgery operations that went wrong. It doesn’t really seem like anything has really gone ‘wrong’ with the surgery in Jordan’s eyes so it’s kind of weird he agreed to appear on the show, but I suppose any attention is good attention, right? You can see a couple of clips from it below: