I was always envious of kids that had treehouses in their gardens because they look really cool. I mean, it’s a house. In a tree. These kids were extremely lucky that they had a tree in their back garden big enough to hold a house and also that they had a really cool dad. I bet they thought they were absolute bosses sitting up there, surveying the garden, trading Pokemon cards, not letting girls in.
Well they wouldn’t have felt like such kings if they had known about what the Korowai tribe get up to over in Papua New Guinea.
These guys are a proper hardcore tribe. None of those plastic bag carrying, market-visiting Man United fans, with their contact with the outside world and all that fancy malarchy. No, all these guys need is a little vine thong, a stick and the Indonesian rainforest.
But the shit that they can knock up is pretty incredible. They go up to these bloody great monsters of trees and start chopping with dinky stone-age hammers. Then once they’ve finally toppled it, they set about using it to build a ladder up the side of the next one. And they keep going all the way to the fvcking canopy, 35m off the ground.
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Then they pass some beastly planks all the way up to the top and construct a house in the sky. Then they have a little smoking break and set about clearing all the branches from the top of their new tree, which they do by standing on the branches and chopping them off a few inches in front of their feet. 35 metres above the ground. I would not be able to move form the centre of the platform if I was that high up in a tree. Those loin cloths are not close to being enough to hide the Korowais’ massive cojones.
Then, when its finally finished and all the women and children have climbed in, and just when you thought they’d had enough crazily terrifying antics for the day, they proceed to light a fire in the centre of their wooden treehouse. Mental.
But seriously, the end result is spectacular. Imagine living in a place like that. All you need is a sticky icky plant and reliable source of some Sick Chirpse and you’re pretty much sorted.
That shot at 5:31 is pretty special.
Apparently the Korowai were part-time cannibals until a few years ago so best to scope out the local area before getting to work on your new house. I’m going tonight to get the best spot. See you in Papua guys.