Most of the stories you hear about giving birth are absolutely horrific and sound like they involve the most intense amount of pain ever encountered by anyone, but apparently it’s not all that bad.
According to mother of four Emily Street there is actually a way for you to experience no pain during birth and then boost that experience by having a three week orgasm afterwards. She advocates this all down to hypnobirthing, which taught her to control the pain using breathing techniques.
Emily explains the process:
A three-part hypnobirthing course immediately helped me feel relaxed about what was coming, rather than nervous.
The whole idea behind hypnobirthing is distraction in order to keep you calm and to conserve your energy.
When my labour first started, I was at home and it was about 11pm. I went downstairs, put on a chick-flick movie starring Jennifer Aniston and told myself to relax.
I woke up [husband] Paul, he packed the car, made me a snack, and at around 7am we decided to go to hospital.
And once we got to the water birthing room, the hypnobirthing became all about working with my own body.
Rather than taking deep breaths in and tightening up, you take really nice long, slow breaths, with the lights down and the music playing.
I’d asked for talking to be kept to a minimum so that I could really focus – certainly didn’t want someone shouting, ‘Push! Push! Push!’
It all felt very new and intense, but it was never overwhelming or unmanageable.
Oscar arrived just before 8am. I had a fabulous birth, and there was no pain relief.
It surprised me how well it worked.
The euphoria that I felt after the birth was very, very close to an orgasm sensation, which lasted for three or four weeks as opposed to something that’s very intense for a short amount of time.
From my point of view, I’m happy with that.
There’s not a midwife or doctor in the land who’d argue that a relaxed woman isn’t going to find labour more easy.
I absolutely loved every minute of being in labour. I don’t want any more children but I would love to have that sensation again.
I’m gutted I won’t ever experience it because I think it’s absolutely amazing.
The difference we can make to a pregnancy changes the relationship between mother and baby for the better.
It really can change people’s lives.
Now, call me sceptical and I’ll admit I don’t know the first thing about giving birth, but this reads an awful lot like Emily is actually getting paid by some hypnobirthing company to say all this, because it really does sound a little too good to be true. I mean she’s even got a couple of photos from her experience for more emphasis AND admits that she now works as a midwife consultant for the Reproductive Health Group, so this is pretty much a certainty really isn’t it? Right?
Even if it wasn’t though, my main question would be why aren’t all women doing this if it’s so good and why isn’t it the norm for women giving birth? Not trying to be a prick, it just seems really weird if it’s THAT good and gives you a three week long orgasm afterwards. Please enlighten me.
If you’re not giving birth any time soon, here are some mushrooms that cause women to spontaneously orgasm. Nice.