The Pope Joins Twitter

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the pope joins twitter

Wow. We all knew that twitter was super cool because famous celebrities like Joey Barton and Michael Owen and Lewis Hamilton (and not so famous celebrities like Nick Griffin and Chantelle Houghton)  would use it to look like absolute twats in front of the general population who probably thought they were twats in the first place but at least almost certainly didn’t actually like them, but now it’s true importance has really been confirmed as the Pope himself has signed up for the social media service. Did y’all like the way I used confirmed in that sentence?

Anyway, wow. Obviously the Pope is a huge deal even though hardly anyone I know is actually that religious it was still pretty cool when he came to England a year or so ago and drove around in his Popemobile. We probably should have known then that he would be embracing 21st century technology so it was only a mater of time before he would be joining twitter. He’s going to be using the handle @pontifex which is a Latin term for bridge builder, which doesn’t really sound that relevant to the Pope but it turns out the Vatican were too slow with their social media policy and all the good handles were already taken. If I was them I might have tried to DM they guy who has @thepope (who looks like he’s a latino gang member or something) and buy it off him or do a deal so he will escape eternal damnation in exchange for it, but I guess they decided against  that or whatever. I would feel a lot better tweeting @thepope rather than @pontifex if I wanted this shit to be taken seriously though #justsayin.

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Even though this was announced yesterday the Pope already has around 350K followers even though he hasn’t even posted any tweets. I think I’ve had my twitter for about two years so it looks kinda pathetic when I only have 328 followers after about 2000 tweets so pls follow me if you get the chance (@timw_brap). It said in the official statement that was reelased by the Vatican that the Pope would ‘follow no-one’ so I was a bit disappointed when I looked on his twitter today to find out he was actually following 7 people. WTF?! It was OK though it was still kinda true as these are just the Pope’s twitter feed in different languages. I didn’t check to see how many followers each of those accounts had, but it probably puts his otal number up to way more. What a baller.

If you’re wondering what the Pope is gonna tweet about, much like most important world figures he won’t actually be writing his own tweets and they will be prepared by his aides before he looks over them and approves them before they go out to the world. Most of his posts are expected to feature the content from his speeches at his weekly general audiences and Sunday blessings and other important religious events. Apparently there is no set pattern to the Pope’s tweets and he will tweet WHENEVER HE WANTS. Despite that rather badass last line the content sounds kinda boring and that it might be just links to longass speeches so I probably won’t be giving him a cheeky follow. If you feel differently though check him out @pontifex.

Excitingly though in something that I don’t think has ever happened before, the Pope’s first tweet is gonna be sent from a general audience on December 12th and you might even be able to live stream it. That would be pretty cool huh? Maybe you could get two computers set up and watch the stream on one and see your twitter feed update on the other. A Catholic internet nerd’s wet dream. The first tweet is going to be a response to questions about religion you can ask the Pope in the next week or so using the hashtag #askpontifex. Again, sounds like riveting content and he will probably be trolled pretty hard by idiots asking questions like ‘Y Iz Rlgn So Batty?’ or ‘Why do Catholic priests rape so many little children?’ I guess that might be slightly entertaining but not really. Maybe I’ll tune in.

Also it must be said that, despite being one of the most backwards organisations in history in terms of its development it’s pretty cool that the Catholic church embraces new forms of technology so readily. Irony, lol.

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