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New York City Has Officially Banned Pooping On The Subway And Buses

Why is this even an issue?

2020 has been a year of firsts for a lot of people, but perhaps one of the most important first is this new piece of legislation that will formally ban people from pooping on the buses and subway cars of New York City.

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I’m not really sure what to take from this because it seems bizarre that so many people would be taking shits on subway cars and buses that it’s become such a problem that the Metropolitan Transit Authority has moved to formally ban people from doing it, but I guess that this is actually a problem in New York City in 2020? Mad – even madder when you think about the fact we’re going through a global pandemic at this point as well.

It turns out that taking a dump is already kinda banned and subjected to a $100 fine under a rule which identifies ‘create[ing] a nuisance, hazard, or unsanitary condition (including, but not limited to, spitting or urinating)’ as actions deserving of this imposition. However, a meeting will specifically add ‘defecating’ to that description this afternoon. Crazy.

MTA spokesman Tim Minton said the following about the rule change in a statement:

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MTA rules are periodically tweaked to enhance clarity, and that’s the case with the addition of more descriptive language.

Ensuring the transportation system provides an appropriate quality of life experience for our workforce and customers is a guiding principle and top priority.

Yeah, I’m totally backing it if there’s enough people pooping all over trains in New York City that they actually feel the need to change the language. And yes, as I surmised this is in fact because cases of people ‘defecating’ on New York City public transport have skyrocketed in 2019.

The MTA insists that this is the result of more people reporting these instances now rather than more of them actually occurring and there is some evidence to support this as cleaning crews have long complained about the absolute filth they have to deal with every day of their lives. Just not really sure on a couple of things here.

Firstly why hasn’t the MTA done anything about it before this if it’s been a known problem for some time and secondly – and most importantly – what the heck is wrong with people that they’re all regularly taking dumps on public transport? At least go to the back of some deserted alley or something if you actually have to do that?

Come on man. Hopefully it won’t be a problem much longer

For more pooping, check out this job where you get paid $10,000 to track your turds for three months. Probably worth it.

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