The legal system in our country scares me, but in America cops and courts sound even more terrifying. I was in LA once and had a problem pumping gas at a gas station (they pay before they pump rather than after and I was confused as to why the pump wasn’t pumping – simple mistake), there happened to be some surly P.I.Gs in the vicinity so I asked for their help  in my quaintest English brogue. They reacted as if I was some sort of gangster lord. They were cocks basically and not the good kind that crows.

That aside, the following story initially filled me with hope. Jason Cantrell was a 43 year old assistant city attorney who had worked in the role for 17 long years, including six as a public defender in juvenile court. This Monday it all went a bit shits up for him. He was going about his legal business in the court room chatting to some police chaps when a zoot plopped gently out of his pocket on to the floor. Whoops. According to witnesses the police exchanged “baffled looks” before conducting the very easy arrest, laughing merrily as they escorted him off.

An extra LOL is that when he ran for a judge’s seat on New Orleans’ Juvenile Court in 2009 he described himself as “A Tough Judge for Tough Times” and also promised to implement mandatory drug court for all first-time juvenile drug offenders. HA! Makes you wonder just how many of these trumped up law dicks are toking on the sly. Not enough of them probably. Initially I thought he might be a bit of a dude when I read the headline, but actually he sounds like a bit of a two faced dick tard. Practice what you preach and all that jazz.

Jason is currently suspended without pay as he gets a wrap on the johnson from the big boys. In an interesting twist, his wife Latoya (pictured below) is candidate for New Orleans City Council, so she is also ultra-jazzed off too. She is still planning on running though, and on her Facebonk page she wrote that she is….

“…..angry, embarrassed and disappointed….. I absolutely do not condone his actions…. He will accept the legal consequences as the judicial process takes its course….”

I wonder if Cantrell will volunteer himself for one-to-two years of weekly rehab meetings/ piss tests, like he used to proscribe for first-time juvenile offenders; or if he’ll just settle for the $500 fine? Hmmmm… I wonder.