Max Payne has moved to Brazil. Bullet time still works in the Southern Hemisphere though.

I only get excited about new video games when they involve the characters that I grew up playing their video games. Or if it’s a new edition of FIFA/Pro Evo (whichever’s hip this year) but you I don’t really get that excited about them anymore because it’s inevitable that everyone is going to buy it anyway – it’s not really exciting it’s just a formality. So you know, that’s the only reason that I’ve got excited about new Resident Evil and Duke Nukem games on Sick Chirpse. And the new Max Payne game.

Max Payne was cool but the movie sucked hard. The new game does look completely sick though. Like I think I said before in the previous post, the action has moved to Brazil and Max Payne is working security for some local ‘businessman.’ This trailer is supposed to reveal a lot more of the ‘plot’ of the game, which I’m sure is what most gamers are eager to find out about, right?  Turns out this ‘local businessman’ – who has the awesome name of Rodrigo Branco – has a hot younger wife who ‘likes to be dangerous’ and ends up getting kidnapped on Max Payne’s shift. Oh shit, you know what that means right?

Yeah that’s right – Max Payne has to shoot his way through the whole of Sao Paulo and try and rescue her. Knowing Max Payne games it will probably include a bunch of flashbacks about the death of his family, some reference tot hat stupid drug Valkyrie that everyone in that stupid city he was living in in the previous games was doing, and probably some kind of dumb conspiracy that nobody really cares about, like the girlfriend masterminded the kidnapping to get all of Rodrigo Branco’s money or whatever.

Nobody cares about the plot though, right? I don’t even know why video games these days make them so elaborate. Everyone knows it’s all about going into bullet time and killing a bunch of Brazilian thugs. The trailer shows a lot of that too and make the game look like it’s going to be sick. The change in scenery from a dark rainy city to a bright vibrant one actually looks like it’s going to work pretty well too. Let’s hope it’s better than Duke Nukem at least. It’s due to hit the shelves May 18th.

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