A new joint study by the Montefiore Medical Center in the Bronx, New York and the Kasturba Hospital for Infectious Diseases in Mumbai, India, has found that having a pair of balls makes you more vulnerable to coronavirus.
Featured Image VIA
Researchers tracking the recovery of 68 patients in Mumbai found that the virus took a much worse toll on men as it latches onto a protein known angiotensin-converting enzyme 2 (ACE2) which is found in large quantities in the testicles.
Since testicles are walled off from the rest of the body’s immune system, the virus can stay there for ages, which explains why women tend to recover from the disease faster.
The worst part is that you’d usually expect some kind of silver lining like ‘masturbation helps keep your balls coronavirus-free’, but as this study points out the immune system has nothing to do with your balls and so that’s a no-go. The only other option is lopping them off altogether but I think we’d all rather take our chances with the disease (correct me if I’m wrong).
What I want to know is what God was thinking when he (or she) came up with this design flaw in our anatomies? Why the disconnect between our ball sacks and immune system? More to the point why are our balls sacks a top tier breeding ground for a killer disease? It’s bad enough that they’re just dangling out of our front and prime targets for rapid footballs, bike handles and dog headbutts. But no they just had to be prime real estate for a killer virus as well. Cheers.
It gets worse – there’s another recent study out there linking marijuana with testicular cancer. Give our bollocks a break, will you?
[h/t NY Post]