CHIRPSES

IPHONE USERS ARE SLUTS

Ever thought of making a graph comparing your brand of smart phone with how much $ex you have? Somebody did.

It’s true, Iphone users are sluts. These stats came about a year ago but I didn’t notice them then so I figure a bunch of other people missed them too and I feel like it’s very important information that the readers of Sick Chirpse will definitely be interested in.

Turns out that last summer the folks at Gizmodo.com completely stumbled across these statistics by accident when they were attempting to determine the variables that affected how to make a good profile picture for the online dating website OkCupid.com. They go to investigate really interesting variable like the type of camera used to take the picture and the time of day that the picture was taken. Yeah, apparently they really do that kind of stuff on Gizmodo.com. They examined 11 million images – obtained from the dating site ok during this experiment. No shit, 11 million. Gizmodo.com sounds like a cool website to work out, maybe I’ll hit them up if things don’t work out here at Sick Chirpse.

Anyway, when those geeks had finished figuring out which camera was the best to take a profile picture with, they realised that they had loads of data about blackberries and Iphones and Androids, and also loads of data about the sexual activity of their owners because it was from a dating site. So bam, they put the figures into Excel and came out with the following graph:

In case you’re one of those retards who can’t understand graphs or maps or something, the graph pretty much explains that Iphone users have almost twice as many sexual partners as Android users. More generally it also shows us that women who own smartphones are sluttier than guys who own smartphones. Who would have thought it huh? What does this mean? I don’t really know but it’s kinda interesting right? I think it’s kind of fascinating as well how a bunch of nerds can find out interesting information about $ex. Also, I’ve owned an iPhone for about three years. Just saying.

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