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Here’s The ‘Cake Crush’ Sex Tape That Got A Greek Orthodox Priest Suspended

This is really, really weird.

A high-ranking Greek Orthodox priest named George Passias has been forced to resign after he was busted having an affair with parish-school principal Ethel Bouzalas, following the emergence of a weird cake crush sex tape that involved Bouzalas getting sexual with a cake. Well, I don’t know about sexual — she sat on the cake and I guess Passias watched and wanked himself off.

The video and other photos/videos featuring the pair were apparently stolen from Passias’s laptop in his church office and forwarded to the press.

Passias said:

I will now fade out of this world for a considerable time according to God’s will. He has chosen for me… that I should retire and follow the way of silence, prayer, fasting, and utter devotion to our Lord.

That’s probably a good idea mate. Here’s the video:

Have to think that kind of weird sexual kink comes with being a priest, surely? I mean they’re under so much pressure not to have sex or girlfriends or anything that it must drive them insane, till eventually they end up having to sneak around in secret getting their kicks from girls sitting on cakes. Does the bible say anything about sitting on cakes? Pretty sure God or whoever just wants us to be happy so long as we’re not harming anyone, right?

I say #FreeFatherGeorge (so to speak, he’s not in prison). Although I guess he is kinda free to do what he wants now that he won’t be working in the church any more.

Just keep him away from this selection of cakes, and we’re all good.

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