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You Can Now Get Bathing Suits That Help You Hide Your Boner On The Beach

Cutting edge technology.

There’s not many things worse than enjoying a fine summer’s day on the beach when suddenly, you’re rocking a massive boner (well OK maybe not massive) and all you can think about is how humiliating it would be if someone were to clock on.

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It’s not like you can tuck your boner into the waistband of your swimming trunks because obviously, you’re shirtless when you’re at the beach. So what are you supposed to do about it? Run into the ocean and stay there until your boner disappears? Stand around awkwardly with your butt out like someone who has never stood up in his life before?

Well that’s where PornHub comes to the rescue with their brand new ‘Bonerless Bathing Suit’ – an ingenious piece of new technology equipped with special lining that makes sure your hard-on goes 100% undetected:

Just one blatantly obvious and glaring problem with the Bonerless Bathing Suit though if you ask me – the giant ‘Pornhub’ logo on the side of the trunks. I mean if there’s one way to make sure no one thinks you’re the type of guy to get boners at the beach, it’s wearing official Pornhub brand swimming trunks right? A Pornhub logo on your swimwear definitely screams ‘no boners’. Seriously, what were they thinking?

Regardless, the technology obviously works so it would be good if it were incorporated into other non-porn branded bathing suits. Just seems like it would make life easier for everybody. Nobody wants to get a boner at the beach and you can be damn sure no one wants to see a boner at the beach either. 

For more boners, check out the time John Cena got an erection in the middle of the ring after The Undertaker gave him a Tombstone piledriver. Awkward.


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