Battle To The Death: Wasp vs Bee

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Shit, I hate wasps. They’re really uncool dudes and get angry about anything. It’s like as if they constantly inject themselves with roids and go on 24/7 rages, ruining everyone’s day by buzzing around their pints and faces; slamming their sting into anybody and anything for no other reason than simply because they can. I’ve always wondered what’s the actual point of wasps even existing because they don’t seem to help out Mother Nature at all – does anything eat wasps? – and are basically taking up space for another creature that would be 10x cooler and would actually give Mother Nature a hand in the circle of life.

Perhaps that’s why they’re so angry, though? They don’t have anything to do that benefits anyone and are the equivalent of a dole-bum you see on Jeremy Kyle, hanging around the streets all day, hurling abuse at everybody and attacking anything they see looks at them in the wrong way. Fuck wasps. I don’t enjoy seeing any insect/animal getting killed, really, but the satisfaction when that rolled up paper crushes the irritating bastard is close to a hangover wank and I can’t help but feel good and tough after it. I just hope the Wasp God isn’t reading this because I don’t really wanna die just yet.

Bees, however, are a different story. I love bees. They’re cool dudes. They spend their days minding their own business and flying around, harvesting pollen and helping the world tick by, bit-by-bit. I’ve never met an angry bee and they always seem really chilled and easy and they’re the sorta guys I’d happily enjoy a pint or a smoke with. And because I love bees,  this video has made me hate wasps even more. A while back I wrote another Battle To The Death post, involving a spider and a wasp. You can read it here (you should). This is another Battle To The Death post, involving a wanker wasp and a bro bee. The guys filming it have obviously been smoking some pretty good stuff, if you listen to them.

So, who would win in a fight? A wasp or a bee? I’m, not gonna give it away but let’s just say being an angry dude is good for fighting – at least – especially when you can tear your opponent in half and fly away with the carcass.

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