Let’s face it, most us blokes love a good burp. Pair a burp with scratching your balls or having a hangover shit or shagging your missus/a fit bird and we don’t need much more than that. Feeling the tingling of loose air from your stomach, shaking its way through your throat and crashing out of your gob and evaporating into the air, leaving a lovely little stench behind, is an awesome feeling. It reminds you that being human ain’t that bad, after all. One tip, though, when you’re going down on a girl, try not to burp. I dunno why but it really kills the mood.
However much we like to burp, this guy probably loves mouth-farting more than you. His name is Tim Janus (say it quick and it sounds a bit like tinged anus) and he’s recently broken the World Record for the longest burp. He blasted the monster out and it lasted an impressive 18.1 seconds. He was competing with 4 other burpaholics for the coveted title of ‘The World’s Longest Burp’ but he absolutely demolished their efforts and showed them that they should just give up.
‘I was just trying to condense all the air in my stomach and bring it to the surface. You just have to force every last bit of air up. It’s beautiful, really.’
Yeah, beautiful indeed, you human balloon. Here’s the video:
Reckon you can beat good ol’ Janus the Anus? Let us know if you think you’re big enough. Oh, yeah, and be sure to check out the World Burping Federation page. No joke.