I’ve never really thought about when it became funny for people to draw dicks on other people’s properties or faces or whatever, but it turns out it’s been going on for at least 2000 years if these latest cave carvings are to be believed.
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A bunch of archaeologists from Newcastle University and Historic England have found a whole set of carvings in a quarry near Hadrian’s Wall in Cumbria that they think date back all the way to the year 207 AD. And they’re still drawing dicks on the walls. Historic England are saying that the dick pics aren’t banter like we have now though, and are instead a Roman symbol for good luck. Not buying that personally, but you know, whatever.
Mike Collins, who works as the Hadrian’s Wall ancient monuments inspector for Historic England, was pretty excited about finding these carvings though:
This Phallus is a Roman symbol meaning 'good luck'
— Historic England (@HistoricEngland) February 27, 2019
These inscriptions at Gelt Forest are probably the most important on the Hadrian’s Wall frontier.
They provide insight into the organisation of the vast construction project that Hadrian’s Wall was, as well as some very human and personal touches.
These inscriptions are very vulnerable to further gradual decay. This is a great opportunity to record them as they are in 2019, using the best modern technology to safeguard the ability to study them into the future.
I mean that’s all well and good but I think the vast majority of people going to check out those carvings are going to be going to see a dick pic. And everyone reading this has clicked on it for the same reason as well. Should probably just admit that nobody cares about the other crap and the Romans were the guys that came up with the whole dick banter and let this be the end of it.
I mean clearly that’s why these are the most important inscriptions on Hadrian’s Wall, if not of all time and not whatever Mike Collins is talking about. Be serious.
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