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Super Realistic Muscle Suit Makes Wearer Look Swole AF

Perfect for hiding that lockdown body.

Did your fitness standards slip during COVID gym closures this last year? Not to worry, because a company named Smitzen have released this hyperrealistic bodysuit that will have you looking hench AF without even lifting a finger.

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Unlike those fake-looking polyester muscle costumes you might wear for Halloween, these muscle suits are made from 100% medical-grade silicone and look so realistic your girl will probably make you wear it in the bedroom.

Who needs the gym and the hassle of working out/dieting when you can just suit up in one of these bad boys? Yeah OK you’ll be walking around in a thick layer of silicone which I can’t imagine is the most comfortable thing in the world, but who cares? You’ll be feeling good, the ladies will be checking you out, and that’s all that matters.

Not that you can actually do anything about it because the illusion will be shattered once they realise you’re just some massive loser in a muscle suit, but wouldn’t it be nice to walk around feeling like The Rock now and again?

On Taobao, prices for the body suits range from £87 to £438 depending on the size and type of frame required. Meanwhile, online retailer AliExpress is charging £337 for an upper body Smitzen muscle suit. Cheaper than your gym membership, right?

Or, you know, you could just stay fit and healthy and not feel like a massive fraud who won’t even be able to take a woman home for the night without being sued for false advertising. Not to mention other issues like how you’re supposed to go to the toilet or whether it can actually hide an enormous belly trying to explode out of it. Still, it’s an option for those who don’t have the time to get their summer bodies sorted. Although I bet it gets pretty damn hot in that thing. Is it even water proof? Is there a tanned version?

Alternatively, plastic surgeons are now able to sculpt your belly fat into a literal six-pack. No gym necessary! And at least no one will know it’s fake. Isn’t cheap though…

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