Confessions is back! Send your confessions in at [email protected] or DM us on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. Everything we publish is 100% anonymous – just give an alias you’d like us to use.
Let’s go…
samobviously
Told my gf i was exposed to covid so I wouldn’t have to go to her annoying friend’s house for NYE
[no name]
1st year uni freshers, girls were given rape alarms. My housemate & I realised once the pin was removed it acted as a sound grenade. We posted them through every letter box on our road and caused a mass brawl between the neighbours. A ‘well that escalated quickly’ moment.
connalb
Up until recently I thought kale was a fish
Fourthchoice
One of my first times clubbing I saw some kids doing coke in the toilets and went and told the bouncers, then watched as they got thrown out of the venue aggressively. God I was such a little pussy — sorry lads if you’re reading.
[no name]
Had a completely crazy English teacher at school. I had to do 2 months of coursework at home after an operation but spent the entire time playing fifa. When deadline came round I convinced her I handed the paper in and she’d lost it. She gave me a B. I didn’t write a single word.
supjen
My girlfriend got too wasted so I spent the end of 2021/start off 2022 alone in a hotel room with her while she slept. Cheers babe.
watervapoo
Whenever I drive home I have a competition with myself to see how far away I can get my garage door to open from my house. Always makes me happy when I set a new record. It’s the little things!
queefybean
My first year uni accommodation had shared bathrooms, so naturally I got crippling constipation. So I found an empty shoebox and squatted in the middle of my bedroom, producing the largest poo I’ve done to date. Then I had to run to the communal bins outside and throw it away. Thank god I didn’t bump into anyone.
Cmaja
I’m jealous of my mates who had dads growing up
southsidemeng
I am honestly attracted to larger girls (not obese or too fat). I’ve always wanted to date a big girl but feel like I can’t because my friends would destroy me. So I continue to date skinny girls because I have shit friends.
gingerninja
My girlfriend’s family dog died this week. We’re all very sad but that dog was literally the only thing that made visiting my in-laws bearable. I’m gonna miss you Miles.
Big Load 93
I used to do shared lifts with some girl from my school. I got horny one time in the back and had a wank under my jacket over her mum, looking at her in the mirror.
yup
I bought some coke with the birthday money my granddad gave me and had one of the best nights of my life. Thanks granddad!
grizzlyadam
I always thought of myself as quite intelligent but lacking motivation. Now that I’m older I still believe I’m unmotivated, but I’ve also realised I’m pretty stupid as well. I’ve accepted it now but it was quite the shock realisation after having parents and schools teachers gas me up all those years.
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[Send your confessions in at [email protected] or on our social media pages – don’t worry, we keep them 100% anonymous! Just send an alias if you want us to use one).
See you next Friday!
