FOOTBALL

Sick Chirpse Fantasy Football League Week 30 Roundup

Premier League

Premier League

Week 30 finishes on a very low point for the majority of teams across the 100 strong Sick Chirpse Fantasy Football League with only three teams managing to surpass the 50 point mark. Props go to 80th placed Josh Watkins’ Bluesbrother who managed 51 points as well as Nicky Greenhow’s Boomerwanger who are now 8th thanks to also hitting 51 points. Highest score of the week goes to John Ryan’s Obi 1 – Kanobi – 0 who somehow racked up 66 points which is more than the top three’s points combined.

Here’s the weekend’s results:

Sat 9 Mar 2013 – Premier League

Sun 10 Mar 2013 – Premier League

Sat 9 Mar 2013 – FA Cup

Sun 10 Mar 2013 – FA Cup

Southampton didn’t pull off the away win and had to settle for a 0-0 draw. Remy inspired QPR to a 3-1 alongside two Spurs rejects turned good. Reading lose and McDerms gets sent packing – you never know with Bentekkers up top for Villa. Everton get found out by Wigan – who could have possibly predicted that? Man City smashed Barnsley expected. Toon beat Stoke 2-1 when we said 2-0 and it was a lot closer than expected. Lukaku has another stormer to show Chelsea exactly what they’re missing. Liverpool manage to beat Spurs – mental. Blackburn fail to beat Millwall away and will have to settle for a replay. Chelsea almost beat United but also have to settle for a replay at Stamford Bridge. Who could’ve predicted the majority of last week’s games? Crazy.

BIG HITTERS

man city

A pretty big week for Wigan away at Everton and Chelsea at United but the props this week have got to go the way of Man City. It may have been against lower league opposition but they absolutely racked up the points. David Silva got a goal and two assists in City’s 5-0 drumming of Barnsley at the Etihad to notch him up a 13 points total for the week – his best of the season – as he hopes to justify his tag as most expensive midfielder in fantasy football.

Kolarov managed a cheeky 14 points as he got a goal, assist and a clean sheet as everything he touched turned to gold equalling his best points measure of the campaign.

The real plaudits fall at the feet of one of the hardest workers in football (when he fancies it) – Carlos Tevez. Two assists and a hat-trick took him onto a cushty 23 points for the week which is more than the majority of teams scored in the fantasy league. Anyone who showed faith in one of the ugliest men in football, as Mancini did, has just had the faith repaid. Well done you ugly freak of a man.

BIG SHITTERS

big shit

This weekend was full of mistakes especially when it came to goalkeepers…Mignolet let slip to 3 QPR goals, Tim Howard managed to let 3 Wigan goals slip past him but the real shitters of the week went they way of Hugo Lloris and Petr Cech. Petr got teased out of his goal by a beautiful Michael Carrick ball four and a half minutes into the United Chelsea game before misjudging a Rooney free kick leading to his team trailing 2-0 before they had time to realise what was happening. However, he wasn’t the worst of the weekend as he later did a double save at 2-0 to keep Chelsea in the game before they managed to claw the game back to earn a replay.

[yframe url=’www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVVq4o1gZoQ’]

The real shitter of the week came from France’s apparent number 1 goalkeeper whose team were leading Liverpool 2-1 away at Anfield and controlling the game when a long high ball came across the pitch…Lloris felt it was pertinent to run out and try and clear it only to be outwitted by Downing who went on to score. As if things couldn’t be more embarassing…Stuart Downing besting you in and around your area. What an absolute joke. Bring back Brad Friedel. ASAP. Skip to 3 minutes 34 seconds into that video if you wanna see the joke goalkeeping for yourself.

[yframe url=’www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0ycFSTRH-0′]

Here’s this weekend’s fixtures:

Sat 16 Mar 2013 – Premier League

  • Everton v Man City 12:45
  • Aston Villa v QPR 15:00
  • Southampton v Liverpool 15:00
  • Stoke v West Brom 15:00
  • Swansea v Arsenal 15:00
  • Man Utd v Reading 17:30

Sun 17 Mar 2013 – Premier League

  • Sunderland v Norwich 13:30
  • Tottenham v Fulham 15:00
  • Chelsea v West Ham 16:00
  • Wigan v Newcastle 16:00

Man City continue their scoring ways away at an Everton team who couldn’t keep Wigan at bay – City win. Villa are held to a draw by QPR, Bentekkers and Remy both scoring. Southampton score but Suarez and Coutinho keep the flairs on with a convincingly sublime display – Liverpool away win. West Brom keep on scoring via Lukaku but Tony Pulis Anti-Football earns Stoke a draw to stop their string of losses. Swansea battle hard as Michu returns to scoring form – Arsenal snatch a draw though. Man Utd thump Reading hard on the possible first game in charge for Paulo Di Canio maybe? Sunderland beat Norwich at home 1-0, Fletcher scores again. Spurs beat Fulham, pretty easily. Chelsea see off a lowly West Ham. Wigan score but Newcastle match them as the Cabaye show continues. Draw.

Here’s how the league is looking:

Super League Table

Sick Chirpse

League PIN: 8009937

Return to league page

POS Manager Team name Total points Week pts Starting
XI pts
Starting
XI pos
Goals Goal Pos Overall Position
1 Shane Tremlin Trems Trash 1328 23 1030 85484 77 107926 26334
2 AlexanderMark Jones Dunblane Massacres 1312 21 1007 103114 96 15331 33792
3 Peter Jones Joner 1304 22 1030 85484 82 78643 37936
4 Tom Sands Prison Break FC 1301 21 1015 97025 94 21067 39586
5 Huw E Dynamo Kebab 1289 22 948 147877 82 78643 46605
5 Tom Shipley Apocalypse Dudes 1289 28 1132 25618 93 24447 46605
7 Ryan Williams Dirty Buffalo 1281 45 1002 106975 82 78643 51586
8 Nicky Greenhow Boomerwanger 1279 51 855 201317 83 72792 52920
9 Emma Craig The Only Way Is Emma 1242 16 939 154225 76 113578 78110
10 David Williams Muffin stuffers 1239 25 1189 9543 81 84494 80224
11 Johnny Callow Room 362 1227 19 1067 59654 79 96276 88841
12 Billy Mclean Barcemoaner 1224 27 981 123279 86 56273 91017
13 Huw Barker HavantGotAClueVille 1209 13 1169 13859 80 90312 101873
13 Jeff Ingle Jeffentus 1209 45 749 227356 85 61511 101873
15 Drew Walsh Real SocieLAD 1205 12 1101 39715 74 124876 104715
16 Gavin Rapaport Poo 1201 26 1025 89311 80 90312 107558
17 Matthew Stewart FC Boosh 1193 29 972 130108 80 90312 113156
17 Alex Prince Prince Boatengs 1193 38 1043 76021 81 84494 113156
19 Bobby Peliza bObbyDazzlers 1186 45 1008 102350 76 113578 118003
20 Ross Stearny stearnpots barmyarmy 1181 28 1029 86239 69 151595 121378
21 Lee Walsh KeansaKunt 1176 16 871 194249 79 96276 124694
22 Robbie Atkinson diables Rouges 1165 17 817 214221 72 135689 131959
23 Alex Taylor leave-my-arse-a-lona 1158 15 841 206505 79 96276 136456
24 Michael Magee Mickey T FC 1152 34 1189 9543 74 124876 140139
25 Dave Ward Pimp My Side 1148 22 1002 106975 68 156669 142569
26 Luke Skidmore bunchofslugs 1146 28 1008 102350 77 107926 143782
27 Terry Buckingham Real Madras 1145 27 952 145039 78 102108 144381
28 Nikul Patani Brown Bear United 1142 28 1142 21930 82 78643 146102
29 Ryan Addams Fish fillet 1141 18 739 228507 68 156669 146702
29 Tim Williams TIMW_BRAP KILLAS 1141 23 895 182060 78 102108 146702
31 Anthony Ford 4 Dimensions 1132 14 878 190904 62 184137 151801
31 Dan Filer ClubTropicanaDrinkFC 1132 27 1082 50398 70 146351 151801
33 Shaun Williams The Galacticos 1129 21 1098 41353 65 170980 153437
34 Aaron Hicks Proud’s Prodders 1127 22 916 169350 71 141152 154574
35 James Martin Tourist Attraction 1126 31 1126 28066 74 124876 155136
36 Neil Williams Lumpers and Kickers 1124 44 965 135382 72 135689 156249
37 Blake Walton Walton Wonders 1123 25 995 112341 65 170980 156802
37 Trevor Brenson RJBs XI 1123 13 1123 29301 62 184137 156802
39 David Hewitt football 1116 24 1001 107773 67 161568 160433
40 Jon McLeish Bayern Bru 1112 15 1033 83203 67 161568 162493
41 Max Sheppard Fred West Ham 1109 15 902 177947 69 151595 164003
42 Ben Rowland Atheist FC 1100 20 914 170590 72 135689 168452
43 Redwan Elharrak Real Talk 1093 6 1093 44003 60 192222 171900
44 Luke Wyborn The Wombles 1085 20 797 219271 68 156669 175614
45 Ross Williams Tepee Town FC 1079 10 1031 84724 62 184137 178306
46 Elliott Henderson Barsenal 1077 38 967 133917 63 179857 179201
47 John Twinn Pav FC 1074 17 897 180982 68 156669 180458
48 Martyn Aeissame Gratuitous FC 1072 12 895 182060 58 199677 181342
48 Mark Endicott Real Madreadfull 1072 34 765 225180 66 166321 181342
50 Ben Lawson spunkin FC 1071 7 1002 106975 63 179857 181786
51 Sam Lister inter thevan 1070 23 946 149257 67 161568 182218
52 Richard Dulieu Dyslexic CF 1064 40 1064 61634 63 179857 184758
53 Piers Dixon Dixon Balls FC 1063 39 998 109981 57 203263 185168
54 Sam MartinRoss Martin-Boss 1061 27 663 233688 67 161568 185995
55 Ashley Townsend 1 MANNING 1 CUP 1060 35 686 232638 59 196002 186380
55 smart les lemon peng-win 1060 49 1060 64246 62 184137 186380
55 Thomas Foley Unbelievable Crisps 1060 43 916 169350 60 192222 186380
58 Louis Day Spews Stars 1050 12 1050 71104 58 199677 190346
59 William Rowe Keefy’s Krunchers 1048 22 980 124059 78 102108 191155
60 John Ryan Obi – 1 Kanobi – 0 1046 66 1046 73887 71 141152 191919
61 Luke Henderson Luke Ronald FC 1037 45 956 142089 63 179857 195389
62 Toby Dennett Dennethinaikos 1033 28 1032 83975 52 219363 196750
63 Christopher Davies T Dogg’s Ball Hoggs 1019 49 840 206873 49 227608 201859
64 Charlie Hey tiki taka jazz cats 1008 38 1008 102350 66 166321 205603
65 James Blundell Blundells boys 1003 36 819 213613 66 166321 207266
66 Anthony Ward Park Ji Wonders 1002 29 878 190904 59 196002 207596
67 Dean Webster Blues 1000 20 920 166871 51 222254 208221
68 Daniel Ostridge Ajax Treesdown 993 13 1036 81108 53 216397 210434
69 Matt Morris Morris FC 981 8 981 123279 64 175476 214102
70 Mohamed Hussein Why Always Me FC 976 34 877 191411 52 219363 215548
71 Patrick Grayson real aycliffe 975 25 975 127858 62 184137 215846
72 Jack Hopwood FC Kaiser 973 31 916 169350 45 236617 216404
73 Danny Sharpe Team Sharpey 969 11 969 132410 59 196002 217533
74 Daniel Haviland Warriors 965 24 965 135382 39 246339 218614
75 Jamie Sadur Skid Mark 964 31 1005 104642 50 224974 218897
76 Daniel Guy Dans witwickys 955 35 955 142829 46 234561 221279
77 John Hawkins Mmmmcustard 946 13 812 215580 50 224974 223604
78 Michael Sinfield FC Scorgasm 935 29 935 157017 56 206776 226245
79 James Roberts WOOPWOOP United 932 15 886 186970 33 252355 226940
80 Josh Watkins bluesbrother 926 51 926 162929 39 246339 228291
81 Daniel Watson SirBobWouldBeProud 922 41 856 200895 47 232322 229182
82 Christian Adofo The Mandem 917 29 917 168740 63 179857 230221
83 Steve French French FC 912 43 912 171831 43 240376 231193
84 Dave Bunker Team Bunker 905 40 752 226997 56 206776 232686
85 Richard Gilbert Queefstars 904 23 904 176756 43 240376 232842
85 Maxwell Hughes maxibon united 904 23 895 182060 49 227608 232842
87 James Tootill BigDonFC 897 46 906 175595 34 251560 234171
88 Alex Crawshaw Crawshaw’s Commies 875 30 873 193301 52 219363 238025
89 Nick Randles Quallo 861 8 861 198667 40 245025 240151
90 Nick Reid OnOne United 860 15 860 199100 38 247576 240282
91 Mark Guy butchys tanks 851 13 821 213068 50 224974 241552
92 Theodore Morgan DangALangTime 824 15 824 212120 51 222254 244857
93 Nestor Schischka The Winning One 819 18 729 229513 32 253132 245403
94 Nick Bourne Greenham Royals 814 15 814 215056 43 240376 245928
95 Tomn Pitts Gareth Keenan Troops 803 19 803 217892 37 248730 246940
96 Wes Holden Green FC 780 11 780 222636 33 252355 248784
97 David Armitage Real Betties 743 15 743 228052 43 240376 251064
98 Craig Abbs Team abber 742 11 742 228172 31 253783 251117
99 Tyler Casey 50 Shades Of Goals 695 9 700 231822 21 258007 253183
100 Matthew Hurley 12fort 690 9 690 232415 43 240376 253355

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