Everyone knows Russia is one fucked-up place. Sure, there’s loads of hot birds there but they’re outnumbered massively by the number of Russians who are absolutely mental and have curly teeth. If you check into Sick Chirpse regularly, then you’ll know that we’ve picked up on a few things that have gone on in Russia that make the Chuckle Brothers look relatively normal but the Russians think it’s ordinary day-to-day business to see/do such weird things.
One of my mates lived in Russia for a bit and he reckons it’s the most weird place he’s ever been – one story from his time there is that he went to some nightclub with a group of friends and while there, met another group of people who all of them started talking to. The booze was being hammered down and the MDMA was soaring through the roof so my mate was pretty much trampled and ended up staying in the club with the group who he just met when his friends went home.
He ended up leaving the club with his new ‘friends’, and going to another one – about 10 miles away from his flat – which turned out to be a Neo-Nazi club full of skinheads and cunts and the group who he was with more or less fed off his money all night, threatening him if he didn’t pay for their drinks, and he left with a bar tab in excess of something like £300. As he tried to leave, the group wouldn’t let him and told him they’d fvck him up if he tried to leave again. He was scared as fvck, as you can imagine, but he managed to slip away from them but there were no taxis around so he walked the 10 miles home, constantly looking over his shoulder like a paedo on the run, and had an hour’s sleep before he had to wake up and go to his teaching job. So, yeah. Russia’s mental. And this is another video that shows that again.
Imagine this: you’re casually walking down the street, smoking a cigarette, chirpsing a girl or having a banter with one of your boyz when suddenly, a horse and a dog pile down the street, racing each other, the dog barking like he’s just had an enema. Wouldn’t happen, right? Wrong. Watch the video.