RANDOM

ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS: ON CRACK

Finally, dynamite is officially introduced into a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors in which there are 25 possible gestures. Yes, this is Rock, Paper Scissors on CRACK.

We all know the best way to settle who’s going to the shop to grab some more Rizla is to thrash out a good old fashioned game of Rock, Paper, Scissors.

Rock, Paper, Scissors has been a playground, teenage and adult favourite for donkey’s years (since the Chinese Han Dynasty, apparently) and consists of a few simple rules.

1. Only two people can play Rock, Paper, Scissors

2. Rock crushes scissors, paper covers rock and scissors cut paper

3. If both players draw the same gesture then that round is a tie and played again

That’s it. Simple. And it’s that simplicity that has made this age-old game a timeless classic.

But remember in the playground when some chump would always try and pull out ‘Dynamite’ and proceed to pretend to blow-up everyone’s hands, because ‘dynamite beats everything’. That used to piss me off cos you couldn’t really argue with them, dynamite does indeed blow everything up. Until now…

Meet David C. Lovelace.

David has officially lost the plot.

David has devised a brand new way of playing Rock, Paper, Scissors, but with 25 possible gestures to choose from, including… DYNAMITE! (In fact, he even goes as far as to include ‘Nuke’, which obviously makes dynamite look shit.)

This image explains what each gesture beats and what each gesture is beaten by:

Insane right?

David (tries to) explain the dynamite gesture:

“So now you can blow up ROCK and SCISSORS all you like, as long as you don’t mind being ENCASED by PAPER, and not being able to “cut wick of” SCISSORS as you might have elsewhere.”

Rock, Paper, Scissors-25 seems too mental for my head to even start comprehending, which is fine because before David got to RPS-25 after he developed RPS-15, RPS-11, RPS,-9 and RPS-7, all which are explained here.

Sterling effort.


Trending

To Top