Rich Old People Are Using The Blood Of Millennials In Order To Stay Young Forever

Blood Blood

The red fountain of youth.

Getting old and dying is the one thing that all the money in the world can’t do anything about – or at least that’s what you probably thought. However, a new Silicon Valley startup called Ambrosia reckons that they might have the answer to staying young forever.

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Exhibiting at the Recode media and tech conference in Rancho Palos Verdes, Ambrosia is claiming that it can help its clients stay young by injecting them with the blood of millennials. I’m not really sure what science/vampire myths that analysis is based on – apparently young plasma contains powerful anti-ageing properties or something –  but it’s the service they’re offering and people seem pretty stoked on it, including Paypal founder Peter Thiel, who has described the procedure as “promising”.

Bizarrely, this is also a plotline from a recent episode of satirical HBO show ‘Silicon Valley’, which you can see a trailer to below. When life imitates art huh?

Ambrosia‘s Dr. Jesse Karmazin claims that over 100 people have signed up to the procedure at the time of writing, although Thiel himself is not one of them. Karamzin didn’t discount the possibility that he may have gone abroad to receive the treatment though. Suspicious.

If you’re interested in testing it out yourself, then all you need to do is be over the age of 35 and possess $8000. It’s being marketed as a sort of voluntary clinical trial to study the effects of circulating youthful haemoglobin into your old tired veins. And if you’re worried about where the blood is coming from, it’s all from pre-approved blood banks. Phew. Don’t all rush at once.

For more blood, check out this other technique that lets you grow your penis by injecting blood into it. So many innovations going on this year.


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