CHIRPSES

RETRO JESUS DESTROYS THE WORLD – EXCEPT JEHOVAH’S WITNESSES

Old cartoons are pretty messed up.

So I got this off the Banquets Facebook page. Banquets are a punk rock band I have been listening to a lot lately. They kind of sound a bit like a pop punk band but if the dude from Gaslight Anthem was singing. So pretty much my favourite kind of music. If I ever do another punk rock playlist I’ll probably feature them. Anyway, they tend to post loads of funny videos on their page, which i’m probably gonna steal for Sick Chirpse. Hey, at least I’m honest about it and giving them a shout out in the process.

Anyway, this is pretty hilarious and features lines like ‘when he executes judgement over the world at armageddon, he will destroy all but the faithful Jehovah’s witnesses’ and there’s loads of cool old school retro animation of Jesus clenching his fists and sending fireballs down onto the earth and destroying New York City and some woman with a baby. Then he breaks all the dams and creates tidal waves that wash away a bunch of cities and leave piles of dead bodies. Then, and only then, retro Jesus destroys some Christian churches and kills a bunch more people, leaving a massive pile of bodies. It’s pretty brutal for a cartoon, man.

Of course, the Jehovah’s witnesses – who all wear suits, they always wear fvcking suits when they come up to your door to try and convert you, right? – are spared and get to rule in heaven with God. They all look pretty smug about it too. Check out the video below:

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Na4BdqeHoMU&feature=player_embedded

I don’t know who made this video and I don’t really care because it’s hilarious. But thinking back to when it came out way back when it was probably a pretty powerful tool which helped brainwash people into being Jehovah’s witnesses, which is pretty gross. At least we can just look at it now and laugh our asses off about how stupid it is. Hopefully we’ll be able to do that about scientology one day too.

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