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Police Are Threatening To Use Nickelback As A New Form Of Music Torture

music-torture

Surely that’s a human rights violation.

A police force over in Kensington has vowed to use Nickelback as a form of punishment for people who choose to drive unsafely or drunk this Christmas season.

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Over the weekend, the Kensington Police Force posted on its Facebook page that it would open its copy of Nickelback’s ‘Silver Side Up’ and ply impaired drivers with tunes from the universally hated album. They said:

Now, now, no need to thank us. We figure if you are foolish enough to get behind the wheel after drinking then a little Chad Kroeger and the boys is the perfect gift for you.

So please, let’s not ruin a perfectly good unopened copy of Nickelback. You don’t drink and drive and we won’t make you listen to it.

nickelback

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Clearly this is all a bit tongue-in-cheek, but you could imagine this actually happening in places like Guantanamo Bay where music torture is a method used by enforcers. Perhaps this will give them some ideas for their playlist. Listening to ‘How You Remind Me’ over and over again would be enough to make anyone admit to a crime.

Obviously there was a more serious message within the post, reminding people not to drink drive, which is a problem that becomes more frequent over the festive period:

To save any problems at the end of the night, know ahead of time who is the designated driver. Write down the number to a cab company or plan to stay over at friends’. Anything and everything you can do to eliminate the chances of drinking and driving.

Or just do what this guy did and blame it on the beer battered cod… only kidding. Seriously, don’t drink drive. It’s dumb.

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