So through-out the Olympics I’ve shown very little interest in the sports. I know, I know – Where is my national spirit? I am an absolute disgrace etc etc. But last night I redeemed myself by sitting through two and a half hours of complete and utter bollocks, only saved by some fantastic music performances (with the exception of Take That and George Micheal).
For those of you who missed it, here is your guide to the sexiest bits of the Olympic Closing Ceremony 2012:
Jessie J goes down on Brian May
Okay, so she didn’t actually go down on him. But you have to admit Miss J, wearing very little and playing the air-guitar, is pretty damn hot. We should probably ignore the fact that she slaughtered “We will rock you” by wobbling her shaky voice all over the Queen classic.
So here’s what happened – giant billboards were driven in, each depicting one of our British treasures of sexiness. We thought that was it, but no, there was more. The billboards fell down to reveal the real life in the flesh supermodels. Seeing Lily Cole, Naomi Campbell and Kate Moss in sexy gold dresses sauntering down the Olympic runways was a sight to behold. Alas, because all the girls can really do is walk and pose, this section of the ceremony was short-lived. Still, the Google images will last an eternity.
The Spice Girls got hot!
Here are the Spice Girls in the 90s. Bad hair, bad make-up, tight fitting PVC style clothes and the odd bulge of puppy fat here and there. Take a good hard look.
By any stretch of the imagination the above image cannot be considered hot. But take a look below at what we Globally witnessed last night. Millions of pounds, tens of personal trainers and a handful of surgeries later and the Spice Girls are hot, really hot:
Just shows you what a world of success can do to a group of average girls. Seeing them perform together again was interesting. Talented they are not, lucky and no doubt intelligent business minds they are. Their performance reminded Britain of our sense of humor… which brings me to the next sexy moment of the evening.
Boris gets his groove on
You’ve probably heard by now and / or seen the gifs circulating Tumblr and the like. But it happened. It really happened, In true Boris Johnson style he did a “dad dance” to the Spice Girls set. It was sexy as hell! Okay, it wasn’t but it did add slight amusement to an otherwise dull booth.