f you’ve ever used the Tube (no, not that tube you piss into when you can’t be arsed to get out of bed – I’m on about the London Underground), you’ll know that it’s not the most pleasant of places to be. All those depressed, suicidal faces; those miserable mouths that look more like sinkholes; the permeating stench of B.O; the angry, lost young men and women hanging at the back of the bustle, looking for a wallet to steal or a stomach to plunge their knife into; the weird, hushed silence even though 75% of the crowd are talking on their mobiles. The Underground is a different animal, one you have to encounter to really experience. There’s something in the air down there because it’s hard not to feel as if the end is nigh when stood on the platform/s and there should be counsellors at every station, so you don’t go topping yourself after another journey on the tracks.
However, it seems as if not everyone using the Tube is fed up of existing, and that there are some people out there who just wanna make those worn-down commuters feel a bit better and maybe even crack a smile at last. Because some absolute bro/s plastered the Underground with hilarious, fake signs recently and they’re funny as fvck and are guaranteed to make your journey to wherever you’re going that much less grinding. I’m not from LDN so I can’t see these in the flesh, but if any of you Sick Chirpsers have planted your eyeballs on any more, give us a shout.