Elderly Couple Accidentally Delivered £5 Million Worth Of Meth


Is there a better time to try meth than when you are in the OAP stages of your life? This elderly couple in Australia had the perfect opportunity to do so when 10 million Australian dollars’ worth (£5 million) landed on their doorstep like some kind of blessing from beyond.

Featured Image VIA

Unfortunately, the couple, who live outside Melbourne, signed for the parcel but then called police after opening it and discovering it contained bags of white substance.

Image VIA

Detective Acting Senior Sergeant Matthew Kershaw says:

They asked each other if they had ordered anything, and it was quite clear that they hadn’t.

The police popped round and determined the substance to be 20kg of methamphetamine. The dealer had accidentally shipped it to the wrong address. Whoops!

It’s quite incredible to comprehend that someone could be that sloppy.

Hours after the couple’s discovery, a 21-year-old man was arrested in the nearby town of Bundoora.

Kershaw added:

It’s quite a large find to take off the streets, really. That’s 800,000 hits off the street that we’ve intercepted yesterday which is quite significant.

So turns out this sweet elderly couple did what most would consider ‘the right thing’, but again, when you’re in your 70s or 80s and have £5 million worth of meth delivered to your front door, why not just fucking go for it? The old man in ‘Little Miss Sunshine’ figured this out and had a blast. I mean think about it. Your life has already peaked, your responsibilities have whittled down, why not try some of the drugs you were (wisely) too responsible to try in your youth? 

Or if you’re really opposed to trying meth, why not sell it instead? We’re talking 10 million Australian dollars’ worth. Enough to support generation after generation of your family. Instead this adorable old Australian couple took all that meth (800,000 hits!) off the streets and now all the fiends are going hungry. A terrible state of affairs.

Not to mention doing meth is also a very effective way of losing weight – just ask this guy.


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