Requiring people to send in a selfie to watch p*rn is completely ridiculous, but it’s ever worse when the verification check won’t even recognise your face because every inch is literally covered in tattoos.

King Of Ink Land King Body Art The Extreme Ink-Ite (yes, that’s his actual name) has written to his local MP to complain after claiming that he has been unable to pass the newly rolled out age-checks for p*rn sites as his facial ink is mistaken for a mask.

The 45-year-old from Birmingham, who was previously known Matthew Whelan before going all-in on being Britain’s most tattooed man, has spent over 1,600 hours under the needle, but he never could have dreamed that this would have resulted in him being unable to view p*rn one day.

As of Friday, 25 July, p*rn sites in the UK must conduct strict age checks to ensure users are over the age of 18. This includes supplying a credit card and photo ID that matches a selfie. Which sounds utterly stupid, but that’s the way it is.

For King Of Ink Land King Body Art The Extreme Ink-Ite, this is practically impossible to do because the system believes his fully-tattooed face is actually a mask he’s using to conceal his identity. Which maybe it is, on some level, but not when he’s simply trying to access some sexy content to jerk off to.

King of Ink told Need To Know: “It keeps asking me to remove my face. I can’t just do a Nicholas Cage or John Travolta like in Face Off. All this proves is that technology and AI are discriminatory and not set up for people with facial tattoos.”

Here’s what happens when he tries to verify himself:

The good news for King of Ink is that there’s plenty of ways around the verification check which are easy enough to look up. For one, he could get a VPN, but even that’s not necessary if you just use your brain/do a bit of Googling.

At the moment, he seems content with just moaning about it, claiming he is being discriminated against, and using his imagination to jerk off instead (presumably).

“I feel like I’m being punished for being me. No matter how different or alternative you look, there is no place for discrimination – especially from technology.”

“I’m used to having my ID declined sometimes because of my legal name and tattoos.

“But constantly asking me to remove my ‘mask’ is frustrating.

“This is who I am; Why is it trying to change me?”

In fairness, we should all be able to watch p*rn to our heart’s content while wearing a mask in their privacy of our own homes. What about the luchadores of the wrestling world? Or people who wear gimp masks? Well, I suppose they literally could just take their masks off for a second to get verified, but King of Ink here is utterly screwed (until he figures out how easy it is to get around this). Here’s hoping his MP comes to the rescue.

For the British man who’s been left devastated after being kicked out of Dubai over his face tattoos, click HERE. Holiday ruined.