Joy, wonderment and thanks to Allah is what I’m feeling right now. Knowing that there is a new wonder cream on the market that can make me feel 18 again! Phew. Everybody knows that after 18 it’s all downhill in the Vagina department, ‘wizard’s sleeve’ comes to mind. I mean, I’m in my twenties and I’m practically tripping over my labia. Which is annoying, to say the least. Pharmaceuticals Company India Tech have gone and made the vaginal tightening gel we’ve all been waiting for ’18 Again’.
In the name of research I diligently checked the FAQs on the website, including;
“What is the meaning of vaginal rejuvenation?
It is the process to improve the tone and strength of vaginal muscles so as to strengthen the grip of the vagina. This includes improving blood flow to the region, removing dead cells and enhancing the growth of new cells, encouraging a natural moisturizing effect.”
I usually exfoliate down there using an abrasive scrub to get rid of dead skin (yuk) but this sounds much better. Also there is nothing like having a well-hydrated, moisturised quim.
“How to determine vaginal looseness?
Check by placing a finger in your vagina and squeezing inner muscles around it. If you do not feel enough tightening pressure or very less pressure around your finger, you have loose vagina.”
Just one finger??? Sheesh, I might need a quite a few tubs of 18 Again.
“Will 18 AGAIN gel help to get hymen back?
No, 18 Again helps in toning up and tightening of vagina.”
This is where miracle cream 18 Again falls down. Although, my Sex Ed teacher said some girls break their ‘hymy’ during sport (not that I ever did any). So you can, in fact be a hymen-less Virgin.
“Will 18 Again transfer to my partner during intercourse and how will this affect his penis?
Not to worry, there will be no negative effect on your partner. Rather, your partner shall start feeling more pleasure by the time you complete your 3 months usage.”
I’m really, really glad that they included this FAQ as one of the first things I thought was ‘Is it going to shrink this dude I’m bonking’s peen?’. Thankfully, there are no adverse effects. Although I’d better wait for the cream to kick in before I start asking men for intercourse.
18 Again, does sound literally like every girl’s dream come true. I can have a moist tight va-jay-jay just by slapping some cream on it? Intrigued, I called Mumbai and spoke to Zaynab, an 18 Again representative who was all too happy to tell me of all the amazing benefits:
Hi, I was just wondering if you could tell me a bit more about 18 Again? I really want to try it out.
This product is basically a ladies product for the Vagina tightening and rejuvenating. If you are a lady who has more sex then it is the product for you.
I definitely am. What’s in it?
It is totally natural. It contains natural Aloe Vera
I use that on my spots, will it get rid of spots down there?
Yes, definitely. It also contains natural Pomegranate, natural Almond and Gold dust.
Wow. What is the Gold used for?
It is used to tighten the Vagina and rejuvenate.
OK. Will the cream actually ‘re-virginise’ me?
Yes Ma’am. Definitely. The completion of the course is 3 months.
And after 3 months I’ll be re-virginised?
Yes. It will make you like a Virgin again. The effects will start from 3 to 4 weeks. You must use for 3 months and then stop.
What if it gets baggy again?
My vagina. What if it loses tightness?
You may start another course.
How tight does it actually make me?
Very tight, the vagina will become tight like a virgin. Like age 18. Maybe 17 in some cases.
How was it tested?
All over India women used it and all of them love it. Even medical doctors and chemists use this cream as its effects are so exemplary. We have so many customers.
Do you use it?
Yes I use it.
Great, thank you very much!