Australian Man Who Uses Penis As Signature Loses Five Year Struggle To Have It Recognised

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Australian resident Jared Hyams has lost a long battle with Australian authorities to validate a penis drawing as his signature.

Apparently Hyams only started the whole thing as a bit of a joke when he initially drew it at the bottom of a form for the Australian Electoral Commission. It certainly would have drawn a few cheap laughs out of me.

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He said:

I thought it would be a laugh; they would approve it and next year I would sign something different.

But when I did this signature all of a sudden the shit hit the fan. I was receiving letters and phone calls telling me I couldn’t have it. I thought, that’s interesting, why not?

If it hadn’t been for the backlash, none of the following would ever had ensued. Hyams said it sparked something in him and what followed was a five year long battle with state and government over what is allowed to be used as a signature.

Not only did he try to apply the penis signature to his passport, driver’s licence and proof of age card, but he even took it as far as studying for a law degree to try and take on the government. You’ve got to give him props for the mad determination. Something like this might keep me interested for a couple of days but an entire degree? Wow.

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Anyway, most of his gutsy attempts have not been so successful. Initially VicRoads, the company that process driving licences, rejected his application. Hyams tried to fight this twice in court but was turned down and even given a lecture about wasting court’s time. Lol.

He was also rejected for the passport, as Australia’s Department of Trade and Foreign Affairs said including sexual images “could constitute sexual harassment.” Massive lol.

Still if anything, all of these rejections spurred the guy on and he has enjoyed some small victories including getting a new driver’s licence, penis signature included. Hooray! He also managed to get it passed on a health card, and various student identity and library cards, although it has caused a bit of confusion during his studies.

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Reflecting on the entire experience, Hyams said he probably would have chosen a different symbol, although that would have made this whole story a lot less funny.

He concluded:

It’s been an interesting journey, but none of it is resolved. Everything is just left hanging.

And he even ended on a killer pun. What a hero. As said, I am really impressed with how much effort he went to – to go as far as getting a degree to try to make change happen. That’s some Legally Blonde shit right there. He has nearly as much determination as this guy.

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