Ho ho motherfucking ho bitches! It’s almost Christmas! We hope you’re all suitably drunk right now because if you’re not then you’re not doing it right.

Christmas day is the time when family members who hate each other all come together and get way too drunk way too early and ent a semi-average Christmas dinner that some poor sod has slaved away at cooking for the last 6 hours. This is then followed by your dick head uncle getting way too smashed and saying something outrageous to his new girlfriend in front of the whole of your family. You’ll then fall in and out of consciousness on Grandma’s settee while she tries to force trifle and sausage rolls down your throat even though you’re still bursting at the seams from the dry as fvck turkey you ate only an hour ago.

Well, if you’re the poor bastard cooking the Turkey this year then Sick Chirpse are here to help. Our homie Milly hit us up last week and sent over her Christmas dinner special (which was made in June – eager?) that’ll teach you how to make a BOSS Christmas dinner. This will hopefully mean you’ll leave your friends and family full and hopefully not poisoned. Merry Christmas!

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