TINDER: A Few Lessons On Human Psychology

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Each day, as we gravitate closer towards our eventual demise, we rue the wasting of time and become increasingly resentful towards those philistinic pursuits which have been part and parcel of our young adulthood.

Whereas our ancestors’ brains were filled with the worldly wisdom that a lifetime of reading, studying and searching can provide, we rival them only in our ability to correctly recite what Sarah Kimble, the girl you sat next to in Biology in year 6, had for dinner.

If you, too, are living your sex life through Snapchat and determining what of your possessions mean most to you by how many likes they get on Instagram, then you will know what I am talking about. With the advent of Tinder (Tinder is to online dating what ‘Jamie’s 15 minute meals’ is to cookbookery) it’s not illogical to anticipate a similar fate of post-user guilt. But what if I told you that Tinder, aside from merely being an activity pursuing the pinnacle of superficiality, can also teach us some fundamental lessons on human psychology?  Through a look at some of the most common situations in which they arise, we can attempt to learn when we are most susceptible to departing from our better judgement.

New Toy Syndrome

Just as one might leave a plastic cover on a new smartphone whilst still in the honeymoon period with their new purchase,at the outset of our Tinder career we exhibit similar behaviour, reminiscent of such anal types. The manifestation of this phenomenon is through our initial ‘high standards’ which can frequently verge on the downright snobbish. A solid seven point five out of ten can easily find themselves falling to the wayside in this opening innings, we are enjoying ‘playing God’ and the illusion of the infinite well of potential playmates is at its strongest in this period. A mere disdain for an activity (petting a sedated tiger, perhaps?), an item of clothing (why are you wearing clothes with words on?) or the slightest hint of an unnatural eye brow constitution (think sesame street), are all very valid infractions liable to provoke a rejection (hereby referred to as ‘swiping left’). If you are concerned that this particular psychological flaw has been affecting your chances then do not fear- it is transitory- and beyond this first phase standards begin to take a significant dip.

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