S Club 7 – those cheeky pop upstarts from the early 2000’s – had a reunion of sorts when they were all pictured together for the first time since their break up in 2003 yesterday to celebrate former member Jon Lee taking over the role of Frankie Valli in the West End musical Jersey Boys. In case you don’t remember, the group took the Spice Girls’ title of the UK’s most famous pop group – you might not actually remember that but they actually sold 17 millions records world wide and had a bunch of top ten hits all over the world.
Yeah, S Club 7 were big news at the beginning of the millennium. Admittedly this was mostly due to how hot Rachel Stevens was (although I used to think Hannah Spearritt was pretty cute too, and this Asian guy I sat next to in Geography had a thing for Jo O’Meara because she had massive tits), but they did have some pretty catchy pop hits as well that people probably still dance to in Oceana or Flares or Jumping Jacks or whatever the name of the popular cheese club is these days, so you would think that a reunion would be well received. Here’s a picture of the guys in their prime – check out Rachel Stevens:
But seriously look at these guys. Paul Cattermole – who in a fantastic career move famously left the band in 2002 to pursue his rock roots in his metal band Skua (who at the time were described as having a Limp Bizkit vibe with a healthy does of Rage Against The Machine. Original) with a bunch of his old school friends – definitely looks the worst and you would be forgiven for thinking he had fallen into the rock management game after Skua failed to take off, with the sleazy overweight vibe he is giving off in these pictures.
You would be wrong though, as somehow he manages to wobble around on stage as part of S Club 3 with Bradley McIntosh and Jo O’Meara, who have been playing Oceana’s since 2008 under the guise of an S Club 7 reunion tour, which doesn’t even make any sense when you think about it. This is even more surprising considering how terrible Jo O’ Meara looks as well – she looks more like she would fit in as a new chain-smoking hag on Eastenders or Coronation Street rather than trying to convince the world that she’s still a pop star. Bradley McIntosh, despite looking like he wants to be Tinie Tempah, actually looks ok. Hilariously, this is how these concerts are promoted:
As for the others: Rachel Stevens continues to look banging and had a fairly successful solo career after the demise S Club 7 (remember sweet dream my LA X? Banger) but now focuses on her family; Tina Barrett is trying to focus on a solo career but nobody really cared about her anyway (despite the fact she was probably the best singer) because she was boring and not really that fit, so nobody cares about her now; Hannah Spearritt is definitely not hot anymore and prances around chasing dinosaurs at tea time on Saturday on ITV in Primeval and Jon Lee has appeared in a number of stage productions capped off by his lead role in Jersey Boys.
It seems clear – arguably just from these shots of the reunion without even examining the fortunes of the various members – which members of S Club 7 have made it and which ones are still scraping the barrel. Despite Jon Lee’s success though, was it really necessary for him to inject so much Botox into his face that he now looks like a Thunderbird to play the role of Frankie Valli?