I guess if you clicked on the headline you were probably thinking that this was going to be something that Lazer Horse had written, as this kind of stuff is normally his speciality but not this time, you’re in a timw_brap joint. I wrote something about a dude who made a Mario Balotelli crop circle once before so I have got some kind of precedence in this area, although Lazer Horse probably writes about more interesting stuff than me like creepy Japanese ghost towns and the weirdest creatures in the ocean.
Anyway, now that we’ve established who is writing this – because that’s the important thing right? – it’s time to talk about these weirdass underwater crop circles that have been discovered off the coast of Japan. These weird crop circles were discovered by some crazy Japanese dude (they’re all fucking crazy huh?) called Yoji Ookata who, after obtaining his scuba diving licence at the age of 21, has dedicated his entire life to documenting the crazy underwater shit that is going down off the coast of Japan. In over 50 years of deep sea exploration he had never come across ANYTHING like these weirdass crop circles though, and well, if someone who has DEDICATED THEIR ENTIRE LIFE to exploring underwater phenomenon thinks that these crop circles are extraordinary than you had better listen up, because chances are he knows what he’s talking about. They were discovered roughly 80m below sea level and are roughly 6m in diameter. Check out the pictures below:
Of course, the mystery of crop circles has raged for centuries (?) and continues to rage on even though it seems fairly clear that they’re usually the work of bored farmers with nothing better to do (see Mario Balotelli crop circle) but this adds a whole new dimension to the mystery because it’s obviously pretty hard to get those tractors or combine harvesters or whatever the hell they use to make crop circles down to the bottom of the ocean. So how the hell are they formed? Yoji Ookata was obviously very curious about this and eager to find out and so set up a bunch of TV cameras at the bottom of the ocean (wow, I thought that kind of stuff only happened in Titanic) to try and figure it out. Like that was gonna work – if it was that easy why didn’t they just do this in a bunch of fields years ago to figure out how crop circles were made?
Well, miraculously it actually did work and they found out exactly how these crop circles were made. Turns out that for some reason this little fish decided to swim tirelessly through day and night to make these sculptures using one fin and one fin only, pressing it into the sand and swimming along to make the indentations. Apparently, Yoji Ookata deduced from more observation that this was actually a form of chirpsing between the fish. Females are super attracted to the hills and valleys within the sand and will eventually lay their eggs with the male within the centre of them, after they have traversed their smooth ridges and bumps an got super turned on as they make their way there. That’s honestly no joke. Also, as if it even needed to be said, females are obviously more attracted to sculptures with more ridges, especially if they are bigger and longer. Seems like female fish have a lot on common with female humans huh?
Check out some pictures of the fish doing their thing below: