If You’re A Lazy, Messy Loner Who Stays Up Late And Swears A Lot You Probably Have A High IQ
Admit it, a lot of us spend copious amounts of time trying to conjure up excuses for why we’d secretly rather watch Netflix while wolfing down Ben & Jerry’s from the tub than actually go out and socialise with our mates. However, if you are starting to bare more than a striking resemblance to Sid from Ice Age, you’re in luck. A pattern of articles are popping up over the internet which claim that your flaws are actually an indication of having a higher IQ.
Now’s the time to stop mourning over instagram posts of the people who used to be your friends having fun. There’s research that indicates they’re probably thick as shit anyway.
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While most of the bizarre propositions posted by the likes of The Independent and the Mirror are based on individual studies, it’s seemingly been asserted that people who are lazy, swear a lot, love chocolate, stay up later, are messy, like bad films, want to be alone and have fewer friends than average tend to be more intelligent.
What is fishy about the proclaimations is that these particular characteristics are easier found in your average geezer than Stan Smith’s are found on girls these days. Perhaps it’s for that very reason that the otherwise relatively obscure studies are being morphed into articles ready made for Facebook-sharing by national newspapers. You might just even visit their websites for once.
To be honest, there’s probably more truth in this study that found that those who post inspirational quotes on social media are likely to be more stupid than is average. But hey, after setting this post up in the same vein, who am I to piss on your parade?
On the bright side, if you do find a new lease of self-importance in your decision to watch ‘Anchorman 2’ alone at 3am, it’s also unlikely to be long before there’s an article that claims your bad personal hygiene and total disregard for your health are both signs that you’re superhuman.