We all like to make good first impressions when meeting new people, but unfortunately for some this can be easier said than done.
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Meeting new people can be nerve-racking, particularly when alcohol isn’t involved. But do not fret because these tips from Indy100 will help you to get a conversation going with a new person. Obviously this isn’t about tricking someone into liking you, but more about being your best self and putting the other person at ease. Here goes:
Ask open-ended questions
Ask at least two of these. Questions with yes or no answers will get you just that, a short answer.
This isn’t a problem for you, it’s a problem for who you are speaking with, because it puts the onus on them to try to think of something more interesting to say than a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’.
The conversation will flow better too, because an open ended question will give you room for a follow up question, that you won’t get from an affirmative or a denial.
Example questions suggested by Fast Company include:
How did you get into that?
What do you like most about it?
Although you want to lead the conversation down avenues bountiful, you then need to be reserved and quiet to demonstrate you are actually listening.
There is no point opening with a great leading question, if you use their answer to began an anecdote about yourself.
Find something you have in common
Obviously this can’t be artificially generated, and you should not lie about it.
What this demonstrates is that you are listening, and again it reassures the person you are speaking to that they are not under pressure to find something to speak about.
By showing you have a shared interest, you can set the other person at ease.
Who doesn’t like someone that is easy to speak to?
Repeat their name
As well as showing you actually listened, it will help you remember it if you meet them again.
Similarly, when you’re leaving them, commit a few facts from the conversation to memory.
This will also help if you meet them again in the future.
Offer a compliment
Generally seeming like you are pleased to speak to somebody is a good way to ingratiate yourself with them.
The compliment also shows you are observant and paying attention to something about them.
If you worry this might seem like you are trying to flirt, do not lead with the compliment.
Wait until you have learned a few things about them before offering the compliment about one of those things.
While some people are shy when it comes to flattery, the act itself will show off your emotional intelligence.
So there you have it – adopt these tips next time you’re meeting someone new and they’ll automatically think that you’re the dogs bollocks. Which you are anyway, but these techniques will help them realise that.
To find out the two things people judge you on when they first meet you, click HERE.