The latest in the seemingly endless ‘people looking like complete pricks on public transport’ series of Youtube viral videos has surfaced, and it is a cracker. It revolves around a girl loudly arranging to film herself having sex with someone over the phone on a train at Tunbridge Wells, until the train staff rise up in a glorious victory of common decency and she is ejected while everyone around her silently cheers. What a complete babe.
The girl sounds like a cockney wookie and is therefore pretty difficult to understand, to make matters worse she speaks almost entirely in riddles. She explains to the boy that ‘we can have pleasure,’ which seems incredibly unlikely to be the case and also makes her sound like the two foreign guys from Family Guy who don’t know how to speak English properly. She is extremely observant however, reminding the chap on the other end of the phone that he does indeed have male reproductive organs, and therefore is freely available to penetrate her ‘nice cunt.’
I have honestly never heard a more unconvincing opening gambit for sex, but who knows? Maybe it works? If any ladies reading this are failing to entice the man of your dreams into the boudoir, just scream the work ‘cunt’ down the phone on crowded train, making assurances all sexual encounters can all be recorded and verified at a later date.
In a hundred years time when society has fully broken down this clip will be resemble an episode of Eastenders, with the title music chiming in as the audience wonders if he does indeed wish to make a sex tape at her birthday party. Perhaps she could have avoided being thrown off if she had invited everyone else in the carriage to the party; politeness really dictates that she invite everyone, after explaining there would be free White Lightning at the door and sex tapes being filmed in every room like a low rent Playboy Mansion.
Here it is in all its glory, unfortunately no subtitles could be added and I also couldn’t add a function that prevents you from momentarily hating the human race. Enjoy!