Every once in a lifetime, you’ll come across a piece of information that can completely change you as a person and remould every fibre in your body. Your whole world will be spun upside down by a single fact. For some it’s hearing that your ex has sent everyone you know a letter containing the details of your infidelity but for me, it was this.
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The absolute icon that is Ville Virtanen – you probably know him better as Darude, fucking Darude – who you’ll recognise as the creator of club bangers such Sandstorm, Sandstorm and Sandstorm took to Reddit last night to answer a plethora of questions from his adoring fans on the Ask Me Anything board.
Reddit user UrNotFly enquired as to whether the DJ has ever encountered the meteorlogical phenomena and his answer completely destroyed my soul.
Darude has never even been in a sandstorm. How can someone encapsulate the adrenaline packed feeling of running away from a legitimate sandstorm without ever fucking being in one? Everyone stop using this as the soundtrack to your memes immediately. If you need me, I’ll be over by my computer angrily starting a petition to get the revolutionary track to be renamed “Dust Devil”.
I haven’t been this disappointed since finding out that Leo DiCaprio vapes and wears headphones whilst banging the most beautiful women on earth. Talk about ungrateful.