Prepare to set your face to ‘AWWW’ unless you are dead inside, with this story about the most adorable job appointment in history.
A ginger Bengal cat called Millie has been employed recently by a Southampton warehouse for the toy company Bandai as a security guard. Apparently Bengal cats have similar qualities to dogs (sounds like bullshit), and Millie gets paid in cat food and fish. Paid in food? That sounds like exploitation, she definitely needs to form a union and rise up against these bourgeoisie toy barons. Millie has apparently fit into the role well, and has taken to the job of guarding toys with gusto.
A spokesperson said..
‘Millie has always had a very vigilant personality and doesn’t mind long hours alone. I’m not surprised she took up a career as a security guard – the toys are lucky to have such an attentive guardian.’
Here’s some action photos of the little scamp while working as a watch dog, well watch cat, except that sounds stupid. Anyway, JUST LOOK AT THIS ADORABLE LITTLE FUCKER
SHE IS GUARDING THE BOXES OF TOYS, HOLY SHIT BALLS AWWW
SHE HAS HER OWN T-SHIRT AND A BADGE, JESUS CHRIST AWWWW
Also try and forget that is just a blatant and calculated marketing tool to promote Bandai, just come and be part of the reality that I have chosen wherein this cat really is the best man for job, and was picked after her historic drug bust of prolific catnip smugglers. Don’t worry I’ll go back to writing about vaginas and insulting Swedish House Mafia fans again after this.
In other news I have recently appointed a hamster accountant and paid a local badger to tarmac my drive.